As I walked by myself,
and talked by myself,
Myself said unto me,
Look to thyself,
take care of thyself,
for nobody cares for thee.
This poem is crystal clear, clear and true. I was only just now lumbering along the main road outside my estate, chattering away a mile a minute to myelf (in my mind) and reinforcing that sublime self-pity that is more pampering than a full day package at the Amrita Spa.
What caused me, a young lady with a newly adopted perspective geared for humbly-won success to go into such an upheaval. In a word, it is love or the lack of love. Fear led me into a trap. Or was it a moment of divine intervention designed to save me from myself?
In my relationship with S, I find myself unable to commit myself. I'm defiant. Winning is important. I went into it with misgivings and these same misgivings are showing themselves many many months later. What lies beneath is my fierce, maybe desperate, grip on a concept which wants more examination. The idea that I need to be in love, infatuated and utterly compatible with someone before a relationship will work because MY LOVE IS SOVEREIGN. It is so hard to simply be loved.
and talked by myself,
Myself said unto me,
Look to thyself,
take care of thyself,
for nobody cares for thee.
This poem is crystal clear, clear and true. I was only just now lumbering along the main road outside my estate, chattering away a mile a minute to myelf (in my mind) and reinforcing that sublime self-pity that is more pampering than a full day package at the Amrita Spa.
What caused me, a young lady with a newly adopted perspective geared for humbly-won success to go into such an upheaval. In a word, it is love or the lack of love. Fear led me into a trap. Or was it a moment of divine intervention designed to save me from myself?
In my relationship with S, I find myself unable to commit myself. I'm defiant. Winning is important. I went into it with misgivings and these same misgivings are showing themselves many many months later. What lies beneath is my fierce, maybe desperate, grip on a concept which wants more examination. The idea that I need to be in love, infatuated and utterly compatible with someone before a relationship will work because MY LOVE IS SOVEREIGN. It is so hard to simply be loved.
